Embracing The Unknown—Starting Over At (Almost) 40

A Personal Reflection

As I approach the milestone of turning 40, I’m not just turning a page—I’m rewriting my entire life story. And it’s filled with unexpected twists and bold new beginnings. Career-wise, I’ve climbed mountains and jumped hurdles, but now? I’m starting from scratch. And it’s not just about business; it’s about rediscovering what sparks joy, jazzing up my health, and tuning into the real me. Hold on tight, we’re doing this!

The Beauty of Starting Over

Who says mid-life crises can’t be fabulous? Let’s face it, starting over at 40 can feel like rebooting your favorite series—exciting but with a touch of "what the heck am I doing?" Yet, there’s something thrilling about building your dreams with the wisdom of four decades in your pocket. It’s like knowing all the dance moves but changing the music.

But, yes, of course it's daunting. It means stepping into the unknown, equipped with nothing but experiences—both good and bad. Yet, there's a unique courage that comes with deciding to reset your life. It’s about acknowledging that while the first half of your life was filled with learning, failing, hurt, pain, and anxiety, the second half can be about applying those lessons. So here we are!

Turning Pain into Power

Every bruise and break from my past? They’re not just scars; they’re badges of honor and wisdom. I’ve got a toolbox that’s bursting at the seams with lessons, missteps, and those "I-wish-I-hadn’t" moments (dude, lots of those in there!). Every setback and every disappointment has been a building block for my resilience. Embracing the entirety of my journey—every doubt, every hesitation—has taught me that these are not just obstacles but essential parts of my growth.

The Role of Fear and Doubt

Jumping into the unknown is scary, downright terrifying even. But here’s the scoop: those butterflies in your stomach? They’re just getting you ready to soar. Setting up shop in New England seven years ago was a leap into the unknown. The first winter was harsh, but it taught me patience and grit. Because, boy, the first summer was breathtaking. It’s all part of the grand plan. This journey is about turning those "what ifs" into "heck yeses!"

Fear and doubt are natural when venturing into new beginnings. The brain inherently doesn't like change. These emotions are not signs of weakness but are, in fact, indicators of the significant steps we are about to take. By listening closely to our body, mind, and emotions, we can understand what holds us back and how to move forward. For me, this included some serious time away from the desk, getting into nature, soaking up lots of sun (hello, vitamin D!), eating well, and moving my body. A healthy mind lives in a healthy body, remember?

Overcoming Overwhelm

Where to Start:

Begin with a clear vision of what you want to achieve. Break down your goals into manageable steps—just like you need a destination before Google Maps can give you a route.

When I felt overwhelmed, I started small by visualizing my ideal day and working backwards to identify necessary changes. Envision how you want to feel, what you want to see, smell, and taste. Engage all your senses! Reflect on what brings you to this vision in a healthy, steady, and sustainable way. Examine your habits, work environments, and network. What supports your vision? What hinders it? Take inventory of your current routines and relationships, noting what aligns with your goals and what needs adjustment.

By making small, consistent changes, you can create a clear path towards your vision. Start small, stay focused, and gradually build the life and career you envision.

Handling Failure:

Understand that failure is not the opposite of success; it’s part of the success journey. Each failure teaches us something valuable, and recognizing this is crucial to growth. Instead of viewing failure as a negative outcome, see it as an opportunity to learn and grow. Ask yourself what the experience taught you and how you can apply that lesson in the future. Embrace the process, knowing that many successful people have faced numerous setbacks before achieving their goals. Surround yourself with positive, supportive individuals who encourage you to keep going despite setbacks.

When you encounter failure, don’t let it paralyze you. Analyze what went wrong, make necessary adjustments, and take action. Celebrate your progress, no matter how small, and remind yourself that each stumble brings you one step closer to your destination. Practicing self-compassion and keeping the bigger picture in mind can help you stay focused and motivated, even when you face temporary setbacks.

By embracing these strategies, you can turn failures into powerful catalysts for growth and success. Remember, each failure is a lesson, and each lesson brings you closer to becoming the person you aspire to be. So, let’s make more mistakes, learn from them, and keep pushing forward with unwavering determination.

Self-Doubt:

Remind yourself that you are enough. Too long have I questioned this. In fact, I was convinced that I am not enough. So much suffering came from being dependent on external validation. All the anxiety to please, perform, succeed, bend backward to make myself "lovable". It drove me to burning out. Literally. External validation can be withdrawn at any moment. If you hang your purpose and happiness on your friends, family, colleagues, bosses, employees—better buckle up, because I can tell you: it's a rough moment when people rip that rug away under your feet!

But you know what? Let's say it together: Every experience you’ve had has prepared you for this moment. And I'm over here talking smart! You're listening to the queen of self-doubt, Ms. Imposter, a.k.a. I-am-not-good-enough girly. But I was today-years-old when I was finally able to see clearly, let go of shame, and outside expectations. I finally arrived at a place where I can wholeheartedly say: I am enough. Find that place for you and join me on my journey, where it's not about the end-goal but how you get there (and let's have some fun, duh!).

Conclusion: An Invitation to Build Together

My story isn’t just a solo performance—it’s an open invitation to the dance floor. Got an idea that’s tickling your brain but feeling jittery about the first step? Let’s waltz into it together. The path might be sprinkled with unknowns, and the fear of face-planting might be real, but remember, with a dream in your heart and a little guidance, we can make magic happen. Whether you're dreaming of launching that bold business idea or you want to bring your business to the next level, let’s embark on this adventure together. So, let’s connect, share those wild, wonderful visions and craft them into reality. The stage is set, and the spotlight is on you; let’s make this second act truly spectacular. Honey, you’ve got this.